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Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Islam Question and Answer - She asked her husband for a divorce because he mistreated her

 

 

She asked her husband for a divorce because he mistreated her
My husband divorced me two days ago, after just 11 months of marriage. Our divorce is regarded as khula’, because I gave up a sum of money that my husband was looking after for me. When I noticed that what was stopping him from divorcing me was this money, not the love that there was between us, I gave it up and he divorced me quite readily. I loved him very much and I prayed to Allaah that the divorce would not be completed, and I prayed istikhaarah. I kept quiet in the court and I was looking at the judge hoping that this divorce would not be completed, but when the judge asked me, “Do you agree?” I always said yes, so as to preserve my dignity of which I have been robbed by my husband and his first wife (as I am the second wife). 


I would like to ask about the following: 


1 – What does it mean that the Throne of the Most Merciful is shaken by our divorce? 


2 –Is Allaah angry with me for asking for a divorce in order to preserve my dignity, because my husband was not just in spending and sometimes in the division of his time (between co-wives)?.

 

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly: 

We ask Allaah to help you to do all that is good, and to
bless you with happiness in this world and in the Hereafter, and to
compensate you with a righteous husband and good offspring. 

You should note that tests and trials are part and parcel of
the life of this world, and that the Muslim must prepare himself to face
hardships and problems. One of the greatest trials that people may face is
the loss of a loved one or friend through death, absence or separation, but
Allaah, by His grace and kindness, still opens the gates of His mercy to
people and makes it easy for them to find loved ones and friends who will
help them to do good and reduce the sorrow that they feel in their hearts. 

Do not grieve for what has happened, for whatever happens to
a person could not have missed him. Allaah, may He be exalted, says
(interpretation of the meaning): 

“and it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you
and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allaah knows but you do not
know”

[al-Baqarah 2:216] 

Secondly: 

It is permissible for a woman to ask her husband for a
divorce, if there is a reason for that to be permissible, such as if he
fails to give her her rights or he wrongs her or mistreats her, and does not
respond to advice to treat her well and be kind to her. 

But if a woman asks for a divorce with no reason, that is
haraam and is a major sin. 

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: “Any woman who asks her husband for a divorce for no reason, the
fragrance of Paradise will be forbidden to her.”

Narrated by Abu Dawood (2226) and al-Tirmidhi (1187); classed
as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood. 

Al-Mubaarakfoori said: i.e., without there being strong
reason that compels her to seek a separation. 

Tuhfat al-Ahqadhi, 4/410 

Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar said:  

The reports which warn a woman against asking her husband for
a divorce are to be understood as referring to cases where there is no
reason for doing that. End quote from Fath al-Baari, 9/402 

See also questions no. 9481,
12496 and
34579. 

Asking for khula’ is also permissible if it is done for a
shar’i reason, so as to ward off wrongdoing or to protect one's rights or
other such reasons. This has already been explained in the answer to
question no. 1859. 

What is haraam is asking for khula’ with no good reason. 

It says in a hadeeth that the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Women who seek khula’ are
hypocrites.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (1186) and al-Nasaa’i (3461), both of
whom classed it as da’eef. Ibn Qudaamah said in al-Mughni (7/248):
Ahmad mentioned it and quoted it as evidence, and Ibn Hajar was of the view
that it is saheeh, as it says in Fath al-Baari, 9/403. It was also
classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Sunan al-Tirmidhi,
1186. 

Al-Mubaarakfoori said: 

i.e., those women who
ask for khula’ and divorce from their husbands for no reason. End quote. 

Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi, 4/409 

Thirdly: 

What the husband must
do, if he marries more than one wife, is to adhere to the condition that
Allaah has stipulated for husbands, as He says (interpretation of the
meaning): 

“but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly
(with them), then only one”

[al-Nisa’ 4:3] 

If he knows that he will fall short in giving one of his
wives her rights, then it is not permissible for him to keep her suspended
and mistreat her, rather he must give her her rights of maintenance, staying
overnight with her and treating her in a kind and proper manner, and he must
be just and fair between her and his other wives. If he cannot do that, then
he should let her go with kindness, and kindness means that he should not
take anything of her wealth. 

See also question no. 45600. 

If the husband refuses to let her go with kindness and he
does not care about that wrong that is being done to his wife, and the wife
wants to expedite her separation from him, even by paying some kind of
compensation to the husband, then she has the right to do that, and the sin
is on the husband and the money that he takes is haraam wealth. 

We have already discussed that in detail in question no.
42532. 

Fourthly: 

With regard to the question as to whether divorce shakes the
Throne of the Most Merciful: 

There is no saheeh report concerning that. The hadeeth which
is narrated about that is fabricated and false. 

We have explained that in the answer to question no.
43498  

And Allaah knows best.

Islam Q&A

 

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